Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about the different roles friends play in our lives, and the different kinds of friends we all need. For me, at least, pretty much all of my friends serve a different purpose in my life, making up one whole and pretty much perfect friendship group. I have, and feel everyone should try and have the following types of friends:
The Friend You’ve Known Forever: The friend you’ve known since birth, or for as long as you can remember, anyway. They appear in your baby book and have been to pretty much every one of your birthdays. Their family is like your second family, and you can’t imagine a life without them because you have never experienced life without them.
Personal example: I’ve known my amazing friend Emily since the day I was born. I know that I can always rely on her, and our history means we stay tight, even though distance keeps us physically apart. She invited me to her 18th birthday party the other day, and all I could think was “where the hell has all that time gone!?”
The Friend You Can Tell Everything To: Being a teen is hard enough without having all your secrets spread around the school, and even though you’re meant to be able to trust your friends, we all know that isn’t always the case. It’s great to have a friend that you can tell absolutely anything to and know that they will keep it to themselves 100%. It’s also great when they give amazing advice, though sometimes a listening ear is all you need.
Personal example: Tamsin and I have been friends for about four or five years now, and I know that no matter what I tell her, it won’t be passed on. She’s always up for DnMs and makes me feel like I’m not alone.
The Friend You’ve Been Through A Lot With: Although it’s great to have perfect friendships with your friends, going through hard times with them can also make your friendship a lot stronger. I’m not advocating having a friend who makes you unhappy, or that you fight all the time with, but just because you don’t always agree with someone doesn’t mean you should write them off.
Personal example: Quack and I are sub-bffs and I love her with all of my heart, but the beginning five years of our eight and a half year friendship were rocky to say the least. We fought All The Time and generally made each other unhappy. But now that we’ve grown up and can see how epic we both really are, our messy past has made us a lot closer as friends. It’s also taught us what not to do to keep our friendship amazing.
The Friend Who You Can Be Your Total Self Around: This is the friend that you can complain about being hungry, or fat, or needing to pee with, and they don’t care. You can share all your secrets, but also be complete idiots and talk superficial nonsense. They can see you at your most hyperactive and your most depressed and still *get* you; you don’t have to worry about hiding anything from them .
Personal example: Although I have a few friends that I can be my complete self around, the one who stands out the most is Adro. Even though I hardly ever get to see him, our facebook, text and skype chats range from intense dnms to total fangirling. It’s really great.
The Friend Who Is Nothing Like You: While it’s fine to have friends who are like carbon copies of yourself, sometimes it’s also handy to have friends who are your complete opposite. They say opposites attract, and though you may feel you have nothing at all in common, sometimes a different opinion or view on things can be a breath of fresh air.
Personal example: My Geography class. These eight are the Indie Music to my Jonas Brothers. The SBS to my Nickelodeon. The political discussions to my fangirling. They make fun of my interests an awful lot (today they decided my new nickname was ‘Philistine’) but it’s a nice kind of different to have people who don’t agree with you at all on anything, although sometimes their lack of excitement to my obsession-fueled statements can be frustrating. We mock each other, but it’s all in good fun.
The Older Friend: While it’s good to have friends your own age, having friends who are older (and by older, I mean like a year or two, not twenty) can also be a helpful thing. Older friends can give the best advice, because they’ve been there before, and they also are (slightly) more mature than your same-aged classmates can be.
Personal example: Most of my friends I met in France were a few years older than me. In particular, my American friends Monika, Cassandra and Sandra, were all eighteen to my sixteen. I feel hanging out with them helped me to mature and now they’re there to give me awesome life advice.
The Best Friend: The one person who is always there for you. Even though there may be distance, or time, or various other factors between you, they’re the one person who you can always count on. The one friend you can’t imagine your life without. You do everything together and everyone just knows you’re best friends. You can be a complete idiot around them, or completely serious. You make plans for the future together because you just know they’ll be a part of it. They’re the finishing piece to the friendship puzzle, and no group is truly complete without one.
Personal example: Toong and I have been best friends since…I don’t even know when. Year seven? It feels like I’ve known her forever and we’re like twins. We love all the same things and can spend time together in total silence and it’s still comfortable. I miss seeing her everyday so much, but I know she’ll be a super important part of my life forever. She’s the Harry to my Ron. We’re BFFs eternally, and no, we’re not bitter.
There are many other types of friendship, including some that can’t really be defined, but I decided just to list my really key ones tonight.
Do you have friends that fit these categories?
frangipani princess xoxo